He's Not Him
by madamwolf
Summary: What happened during those six months Walter was kept in the dungeon? Mika/Walter


**AN:** Ahh, I wrote this is Western Civilization, I was bored and I found myself thinking about Legend of the Seeker, that drew me to an old story I was writing during season one that I never got to finishing (it was never posted) and that was Rahl centric so it made me think of Walter. Then I starting giggling 'cause he's funny and then this was born. Now that you know the boring history of the story I'm just gonna go ahead and write it.

By the way, I'm sorry for anything that's wrong. I only saw the episode all the way through once. I don't remember it all perfectly.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Legend of the Seeker, I'm just playing with the characters for a short while. I promise I'll give them back when I'm done.

He's Not Him

It was an odd feeling at the time, before we knew who he really was. I couldn't believe myself, I couldn't believe what I was feeling. Me, a weak servant, a slave girl who had been here since childhood, someone who was not worthy to be a Mord-Sith was attracted to Darken Rahl. I had seen him before, never this close up and personal but I knew his face and I never felt like this. He was like a completely different man, he told them not to hurt me and he actually smiled at me. Wait, let me rephrase that, he _shyly _smiled at me. Imagine that, Darken Rahl, one of the most feared men around shyly smiled at me.

But now I know the truth, he was not Lord Rahl, he was an imposter. When I heard this I actually felt my heart leap up in my chest, I was so happy he wasn't really Darken Rahl. I guess I sort of already knew from the beginning, something about the way he acted didn't seem as threatening or dangerous as it was supposed to. He wasn't the evil man I was led to believe he was. He was someone else who could be anything or anybody and the possibility that he was really a kind sweet man made my heart flutter.

I was overjoyed when I overheard from the Mord-Sith that he was coming back. I rushed out to a corridor that corresponded with the main hall to see him but when I did I was reminded of who we were and where we were. When I saw him he was stripped of the expensive robes he wore as Rahl and was left to wear something worth about as much as my own frock. He was trembling, his eyes were downcast and he was flinching at those around him… he was frightened and so sad. I could only hear bits and pieces of what they were saying, but I did gather that they were bringing him to the dungeons.

When they began leading him away I positioned myself in another hallway so it would look like I was passing by at the same time they were. I only had to wait in the cold corridor for a minute or two before I heard them coming and I began to walk myself. I stopped at the entrance to the hallway and waited for them to pass. He walked by me and looked up into my eyes for only a moment and despite everything he smiled at me. I almost returned it but his smile quickly vanished when he was pushed roughly from behind and urged on.

I didn't actually see him again for another month, I heard things, but I was only picked once to bring him his food and drink. I saw him, but he didn't see me. He was hidden away in the corner of the dungeon, his knees pulled up to his chin and I think he may have been crying. Who wouldn't in a cold place like this?

Two months into his imprisonment was when I really saw him. Though I do wish it was under nicer circumstances. I heard from some of the others that the guards had hurt him, and then I came to learn they had done this before but this time it was bad. They broke his arm and they needed someone to come and fix it before it healed improper and he could no longer pass for Rahl.

Naturally I volunteered to go right away and after receiving a smack for speaking out of line I put some things together and I went. It took me a few minutes to reach the dungeons and of course the guards were there to stand in my way. I explained to them my reason for being here and they laughed, like they were thinking of some fond memory and maybe to them beating the poor soul in the dungeon was a fond memory.

They let me in and shut the door heavily behind me, it took me a moment to see him, he was huddled in the shadows but when I did I allowed myself a small smile at seeing him again and walked over. Only the response I got was not the one I was looking for, he shrunk back into the shadows and whimpered. It broke my heart as he curled in on himself and spoke in a broken voice.

"Please, I don't know what I did, please, don't hurt me… I promise I won't do it again."

That's when I realized his face had been beaten so badly both his eyes were swollen shut, he couldn't see me. "No, wait," I told him softly setting down my basket of supplies. "I'm not here to hurt you; I'm here to help you."

He stopped shaking but remained back against the wall.

"Help me?" He repeated. "W-why would you help me? Aren't you a Mord-Sith? How do I know you're not gonna poke me with your… stick thing."

I smiled a little. "I'm not a Mord-Sith, I'm just a servant… here," I reached out and took his uninjured arm, he flinched back but I wouldn't relinquish my hold on him. Gently I placed his hand on my short hair. "See?" I asked. "No long locks for me."

Through his bruised and bloodied face he grinned. "I like short hair better anyways," he said.

It was a good thing he couldn't see me because I blushed deeply and looked away. "Well," I breathed. "You're arm needs mending and I need to clean that cut on your cheek bone."

He scoffed bitterly. "So I don't get a scar or heal all funny. I need to make a good dead Rahl."

"They won't kill you," I said as I began to clean the wound on his face.

"It's the only reason I'm here," his voice cracked due to his suppressed sobs, I didn't know if it was sue to pain or the sheer sadness of being here, or maybe if it was something else. "They mean to kill me if they need a dead body for Rahl, for whatever reason I'll die by their hand and once again be forced to be someone I'm not. I don't like doing it, I never did. Sometimes it was fun but I never liked it, I liked it better at home… I don't want them to kill me, I just hope that before they do they'll let me walk around for a minute or two. I don't want to die in here."

"I'm so sorry," I whispered knowing it was true, he was only being kept to die. That was why they kept up his appearance.

"I didn't ask to look like him," He continued unable to stop himself now. "I never wanted this, I miss my home, I miss my friends, my clothes, my… why can't they just leave me alone?"

I found myself beginning to silently cry at his words, he seemed so helpless. "I don't know," I replied. "It's not your fault, you didn't do anything. You never asked to be here, they did this to you."

I moved quietly from his face to his arm and at the slightest touch he hissed. "I'm sorry," I said as I examined it as best I could without moving it. "I need to straighten it, or it won't heal properly. I wish I didn't have to."

"No… you need to. Just do it and make it quick, alright?" His voice got higher as his worry increased. "Please?"

"Okay," I said. "I'll try…" I was nervous, I had done this before, but it was never on someone like him. It was always on… well, someone not like him. I didn't wan to hurt him anymore even if I knew it would make him better in the long run.

I tentatively reached up and placed his head on my shoulder and steadied his injured arm. "Here were go," I whispered and pulled his arm hearing a sickening sound as the bone replaced itself in his arm.

I shut my eyes and winced as he screamed and cried out in pain. His buried his face in the crook of my neck and sobbed. I began to endlessly murmur my apologies as I rocked and cradled him back and forth. I couldn't imagine the pain he must have been going through and after a minute or so he passed out and I gently lowered him to the ground. I finished bandaging him up but I couldn't stay, I knew I couldn't. Soon people would be wondering where I was and if they found out I was lingering here I would get in trouble and so would he.

So, I put my things in my basket left him some extra bandages and some water and left. I don't know what happened when he woke up, if he was angry that I was gone or sad or if he just didn't care. But I did know I wanted to see him again and maybe even next time he could see me.

Unfortunately I had to wait another two months before I got my chance and it wasn't as I had imagined it. Once again he was unable to see me and on top of that he couldn't even reply to me, he was unconscious the whole time I was there. The guards beat him badly and I had to go down and take care of him.

When I got down there I gasped, he was lying on his back on the floor, his head lolled to the side and a trickle of blood coming from his nose. For a moment I thought they had really killed him, but when I knelt down and placed my hand upon his chest I felt the steady rise and fall of his breath.

I began my work which didn't take too long, no broken bones this time, just a lot of bruising on his ribcage, I think they kicked him. When I was finished, it just looked like he was sleeping and I wondered is this what Darken Rahl looked like when he slept? No, this man was too peaceful, too kind and timid. Rahl was probably an angry sleeper, a disturbing scowl and frown on his face the whole while. Not that I had ever witnessed Rahl sleep, but I could stay here and watch Walter sleep forever.

I jumped when I heard a bang at the door and I realized I had been here too long. Without thinking I leaned down and placed a kiss on his cheek. I gathered my things and ran out, it wasn't until I was alone in a corridor I realized what I had done and I blushed and giggled softly to myself.

I didn't know his stay was coming to an end until about a month later when I heard them all talking to the real Rahl. They were going to kill Walter and I couldn't let that happen to him, so I did something I never thought I could do in all my years here. I ran.

I grabbed some things and went down to the dungeons, I placed what I had grabbed for him on the stairs and walked down the last few steps as though nothing was wrong. I managed to trick the guards with what I told them was rum but it was really rum and poison. They passed out, but wouldn't be unconscious forever, I had to hurry. I dropped the serving tray and grabbed the cloak and boots I had taken for him, I entered the dungeon and tried to ignore the fact that he shrunk back into the wall at the sight of me. He didn't know who I was, he hadn't actually seen me in six months, of course he would be anxious.

"Put these on," I told him. "Hurry."


End file.
